Are you operating from a place of abundance or scarcity? I’ve had to face this question lately as I let go of the once weres and embrace the what nows. For years now, I have yearned to hike to a place called Conundrum Hot Springs. It’s a challenging 8.5 mile hike, but once you are there, I have heard lounging in the natural hot springs surrounded by the stunning views is more than worth it. Since it’s a coveted place, I woke up extra early to make sure I secured our camp spot the moment permits opened. I was so excited to go there this summer!
Fast forward to now when two blocks feels like a marathon. I got a text recently from a friend asking if I still had the permits for Conundrum. That simple question felt like a huge blow. It was the first time I had to face the reality that there are things that I won’t get to experience and goals that I have been forced to set aside because of cancer.
“How would you feel if that was you? If you were super excited about something, planned it all, then got cancer and couldn’t go. Then your friends asked if they could go without you?” is what I typed out on my phone and sent.
It was an honest text with valid emotion, but I was also operating from a negative place. I cried to my sister over the phone about the interaction and she brought to light something truly important. Where are you operating from? We so often treat life like a competition. If one person wins, it must mean that another person must lose. Like there is only so much “good” to go around. That’s why I felt that if I couldn’t experience Conundrum, no one else should either. But that there is the problem. When our blinders are positioned to only see the lack in our lives and all the things we can’t do, we completely miss out on all the things that we CAN do. When you operate from a place of abundance instead of scarcity, you realize that there is more than enough good to go around. So just because a long hike and tent camping at Conundrum couldn’t happen this year, floating the river and camping in an air conditioned RV in Nebraska could. That’s how I ended up here, and I think the view is pretty nice.
