I was allergic to my chemo today.

My mom had also been allergic to the same drug I started today, Taxol, when she went through breast cancer. But after the initial infusion, it took her body 3 days to show allergy symptoms. Seeing as sometimes our bodies can adapt to the drug with some extra allergy medications, they tried the same drug with her next infusion. It was much worse this time. She had an immediate reaction, blacked out, and had convulsions. The nurses were ready and quickly helped end the reaction… but still. How freakin’ scary.

My aunt also had breast cancer and passed away from having a chemo allergic reaction.

That’s what I walked into the hospital today with. Holding the idea that convulsions and death were on the table if we weren’t extra careful.

Luckily my nurses are amazing. They used low amounts to see how my body responded before amping up the dosage. They also had life saving materials feet away just in case.

I ended up getting heat flashes and turning red the first two times we tried the chemo. This is a red flag that things could imminently get worse: I’m allergic. So they pumped me full of a new allergy medication that blocks receptors and allows my body to more easily accept the chemo without trying to reject it. The third time worked. We made it through.

I have a sore throat now which can also be an early sign of something more major… ya know, like your throat closing up. So I stayed an extra hour so they could monitor me.

I’m home now, thankful I made it through today but also harboring nervous emotions. I’m scared about the next few days on how my body will continue to respond, and I’m scared about the next infusion when my body may be more prepared to immediately be on the defense just like my mom’s.

These things are real. But I choose to be thankful that I have incredible doctors and nurses that are ready to save me if something goes amiss. I’m grateful that 911 is a phone call away to take me to a hospital if it’s an emergency. I know God has me. And I’m happy that my nurse snuck me M&Ms in a pill cup just to make me smile. It’s gonna be alright.